Sometimes I don’t feel very social and I just go to sleep.
I do not care for the body, I love the timid soul, the blushing, shrinking soul…
IF A CREEP WANTS YOUR NUMBER
A series of fake numbers to leave behind.
1-888-447-5594 - Easter egg number for finishing God of War, contains a dramatic speech. Personal favorite.
605-475-6968 - Rejection hotline, politely explains that whoever gave you this number turned ya down, buddy
888-276-6760 - The 24-hour Klu Klux Klanline where you can get a FREE INFORMATION BOOKLET!!!!1!
866-740-4531 - Only responds with “I am Groot”
206-569-5829 - Seattle radio station “Loser Line”. If they leave a weird voicemail, it could get broadcast over the airwaves.
Stay safe, people.
Don’t forget about 515-808-2362, the number that rings and then plays the John Cena thing.
309-889-0497 plays the evangelation theme
Evangelation
There’s also 855-523-9386 which will respond to the caller with a robot beat boxing Korn’s “Freak on a Leash”.
Who knew so many weird almost useless phone numbers existed?
This is wonderful
You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.
there is beauty in being kind
What if oxygen is poisonous and it just takes 75-100 years to kill us?
My science teacher said he thinks that’s true actually
Yeah this is actually pretty much exactly what is going on. It’s why anti-oxidants are such a big deal. Bonus fact: oxygen oxidizes stuff in your cells or, in other words, it’s not toxic, just setting you on fire very very slowly.
What if there are aliens out there but they subsist on entirely different substances and they’re just scared as shit of us and our crazy ass hell planet? Once in a while some alien anthropologist type suggests checking out the people on this inhabited planet out towards the galaxy’s edge. The other aliens just look at the naive academic with horror. No!! We do not go to that world. That is where the DEATH BREATHERS live. They recreationally consume poisons and are more or less composed of biological fire. Their atmosphere is made of rocket fuel. We must leave the DEATH BREATHERS in peace. Do not go there. Do not.
I tend to always reblog posts about humans being terrifying weirdos to aliens.
okay but…that is actually what went down on earth about 2.5 billion years ago.
Earth was doing just fine with a mostly nitrogen/carbon dioxide atmosphere and everyone was happy to go on living in anaerobic bliss and then cyanobacteria suddenly hit the scene, altered the atmosphere composition so that there was a ton of oxygen gas and killed practically everything (97% or more of all species on earth).
We are literally descendants of the DEATH BREATHERS and cyanobacteria is our deadly mother.
The cyanobacteria holocaust is so big, it doesn’t even have a cool name; it’s just called “The Great Oxygenation Event”; the *second* most apocalyptic extinction event in our planet’s history is the one that’s called THE GREAT DYING (the Permian-Triassic event, about 252 million years ago).
This shit makes like the rock-throwing that wiped out the dinosaurs look like kindergarten.
OH HOW I LOVE THIS POST. It makes me so much happier about being alive. I AM BURNING VERY SLOWLY. *hugs it*
a friendly reminder:
don’t hang out with people that make you feel bad about yourself












